Letters I’ll Never Send

I wish we could be a part of each other’s lives. Missing you is painful. Wanting to be able to talk to you is painful. Grieving your absence is painful. I wish we had met under different circumstances. I don’t regret you being my therapist, because you having that role in my life changed me in so many ways. But I wish it didn’t have to mean that talking was impossible. That having a friendship was impossible. That the connection had to stay locked inside the boundaries that k

Tonight’s one of those nights where I have to write letters like this. The kind that spill out of missing someone I can’t reach. I wish I could tell you how much I miss you. How much I wish I could have been in your office today, sitting across from you, the air holding that quiet safety that always felt like a soft landing. I wish I could have heard your familiar voice filling the space between us. I miss your therapeutic silence, the way it could hold the weight of my grief

Hey there, Did you know I actually got that greeting from you? That I found it so gentle and endearing that I adopted it for myself…for the people I want to show tenderness to. Did you know I keep plants in my house because my love for them started in your office? Because the safety I felt there made me want to recreate that feeling in my own space. I think of you when I water them. Did you know you were the first person outside of my wife who heard my story? That because of